Thou Shalt Not Hike in flip flops part two

I am not usually a fan of walking without a purpose, especially if this "walking" lark is to be classed as a lesuire activity.

My general rule of thumb is that if we are not walking merely as a means of getting to somewhere that offers me the opportunity to enjoy a nice cold glass of cider and black then I see little point and refuse to partake in such a venture 96 percent of the time.

However he persuaded me with his skinny jeans and promises of cheese sandwiches and off we set.


In eight short miles I learnt the following;

1. Nature hates me.
Numerous Bees tried to "get me", I fell down a grass verge and various sinister looking ducks took a worrying like to me and his sandwich.

2. Middle aged people hate me.
Flip flops and skinny jeans outfit combinations in the middle of a forest greatly amuses the hiking gear clad Tory voting general public it would seem.

3. I hate Sheep.
They are horrid. Yes, even the little ones.


What ever happened to going out for a drink; In the city, where there are no sheep, bees or Tories?